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This is a transcript of the episode Mission: Mission Creek High. It's still under construction.
Donald: I got a new lab, I got a new lab. I got a new lab.
Bree: Whoa, whoa, whoa. I think you mean, we got a new lab.
Donald: Excuse me.Did we pay to rebuild it?
Bree: Do you sleep in a glass box?
Donald: We got a new lab, we got a new lab. And here it is.
Chase: Guys, look at all these upgrades. Mr. Davenport, this place is amazing.
Donald: Of course it is. I designed it.
Donald: Fine. We designed it. We, we! Upgraded capsules, bam! Quantum processing supercomputer, bam! Four-dimensional combat simulator, bam! This, my friends, is what a multi-million dollar makeover looks like.
Adam: Is there a mini fridge?
Adam: I bet our real dad's lab has a mini fridge.
Bree: Hey, Leo, where's your work station?
Leo: This way, children.
Leo: The floor in the lab is compartmentalized, meaning we can store things in it. May I? Bam!
Chase: Is that a nuclear magnetic resonance spectrometer? Ahh! I've never seen one in person before. It's so beautiful.
Adam: Should we leave you two alone?
Bree: Mr. Davenport, how did you afford all this?
Donald: Well, I used some of the money from the jet wing stunt, but the rest of it I got from a huge government contract I just signed. I am developing a rocket system to protect the earth from rogue asteroids. Thanks to this little baby, I'm on my way back up rich man Mountain, and, whoo, the air smells better up here! Huh? Whoa. Oh, wait, there's one more thing I forgot to show you.
Adam: Mini fridge?
Donald: There's no mini fridge.
Eddy: But there is me! Hello, friends, and I use the term friends loosely because you're not my friends, and I hate you.
Bree: Did you really have to bring Eddie back?
Chase: Yeah, I don't know that I'm okay with that.
Eddy: Well, then you definitely won't be okay with this. Bam!
Bree: That jerk has been doing doughnuts in the school parking lot all morning.
Adam: I know. Finally, a good reason to come to school.
Chase: Guys, look out!
Perry: What's up?
Leo: What are you doing?
Perry: Pushin' the envelope on this little baby's rollover specs.
Adam: How did you afford this?
Perry: Your daddy gave me my first payment for keeping your little bionic secret. So naturally, I went out and bought my dream car, a barrel of pudding, and a lifetime supply of kitty litter. The fancy kind that clumps!
Bree: I think we have different definitions of fancy.
Perry: So you guys are bionic. How's that work? Can you recharge my cell phone? Do you have vacuum attachments? Can you turn into wolves?
Adam: Not yet, but I did put that in the suggestion box.
Perry: Come on, there's gotta be more you're not telling me.
Spill! Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme Bree: She's not gonna stop, is she?
Perry: - Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.
Leo: What do you think?
Perry: Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme
Adam: Okay, okay! We use our bionics to go on missions.
Perry: Missions! I would be so good on missions. I can see it now.
(Day Dream starts)
Adam: I don't know if I can rescue a hostage. I'm scared, girl robot.
Bree: Me, too, guy who lives with the other one.
Chase: This is too dangerous. Guys, what am I supposed to do with my underdeveloped arms?
Perry: Did somebody call for a hero? My own lunch ladies. How could you betray me? And I taught you how to recycle substandard meat.
Adam: Whoa, that was awesome!
Bree: Principal Perry, you're incredible.
Chase: I'm wearing big-boy pants.
Perry: Don't worry, I'll save you, Mr. Whiskers.
(Everyone claps. Daydream ends)
Leo: Please make it stop!
Perry: So when do we go on our first mission? Do I get nunchucks? I want nunchucks. I want nunchucks, I want nunchucks.
Leo: Hey, Janelle, long time no see. I was starting to think you've been avoiding me.
Janelle: Me? I would never- I've been avoiding you.
Leo: Well, I'm glad we cleared that up.
Janelle: Look, I like you, Leo. But every time we hang out, I get hurt by one of your stepdad's inventions.
Leo: That is not true. Name one.
Janelle: The time you froze me in a block of ice.
Leo: That was-
Janelle: The time you electrocuted me and my hair was straight for six months.
Leo: - But I
Janelle: The time you zapped me, and I could only speak Portuguese.
Leo: Sounds like someone should've started avoiding me a lot sooner. Wait, wait. This time, there'll be no inventions. I got us courtside seats to tonight's state championship basketball game.
Janelle: Wow, those are hard to get.
Leo: Yeah, but I know a guy who knows a guy who let me pay four times the value of the ticket. So? Is that a yes?
Janelle: Sure. I'm in.
Leo: Yes! Okay, let me get your ticket.
Leo: Ooh! Okay, in case that affected your memory, you already said yes.
Chase: Man, I'm exhausted. Perry's been nagging me all day about going on a mission. Ooh, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.
Perry: What's up, mission buds?
Bree: What are you doing here? How did you get in our house?
Perry: I used the doggie door.
Chase: We don't have a doggie door.
Perry: You do now. So when are we going on our mission?
Bree: It's not like these things just happen every day.
Perry: That's cool. I'll wait.
Bree: You can't stay here.
Perry: Au contraire, Cinderfrella. I can do whatever I want. And if that means waiting here for six months until a mission comes up, so be it. Delete all recordings? Yes. Might as well get comfortable. You kids wanna help me with a perm?
Bree: No! This ends now.
Chase: Well, what are we supposed to do? It's not like we can take her on a real mission.
Bree: Then let's take her on a fake one. We'll blindfold her, say we're at some remote site, and just take her down to the lab.
Chase: No. No! You know Mr. Davenport's rules. No outsiders in the lab ever.
Perry: Who wants to help me with my hard-to-reach spots?
Chase: And I'm in.
Leo: Ah, classic. The old triangle offensive power break, with a little dribble
Janelle: You have no idea what you're talking about, do you?
Leo: Nope. But these tickets cost me 40 bucks, so you could at least play along. Janelle! Are you okay?
Janelle: Yeah, I I think so. How's it look?
Leo: AAAHHHH! Great! You look great.
Janelle: See, I told you. Bad things happen to me when we're together.
Leo: That is not true. Anybody got an ice pack?
Chase: Alright, here we are.
Perry: Whoa, we got to the mission site fast.
Chase: Uh, yeah, that's 'cause we took a hyperloop. It moves at the speed of sound.
Perry: I know. This isn't my first teen spy mission. Why am I blindfolded?
Chase: 'Cause we're bionic. Your human eyes can't take the radiation of the hyperloop.
Perry: What about the rest of my body?
Bree: You're on your own with that.
Perry: Where are we? Are we in space?
Chase: Uh, we're at an enemy base on the other side of We're at an enemy base on the other side of the world. We have to access their computers, and download sensitive information.
Perry: Oh. Where's my uniform?
Adam: Uh, you don't get one. The tailor says science hasn't caught up to that yet.
Perry: Okay, so what do I do? If a bad guy shows up, I call dibs on wastin' him.
Bree: No, no, no, no. We don't waste people.
Chase: Just stand guard.
Perry: Got it. Don't worry, when they see me, they'll run.
Bree: I don't doubt that.
Chase: Look, look, just sit Stop, sit down, and stop touching stuff.
Perry: Hey, I'm on a mission now, too. - I don't have to take any -
All: Sit down!
perry: Fine! What did you do?
Chase: That's a brand-new console.
Perry: So what? It's not yours. What do you care?
Chase: Because If we leave the place a mess, we're no better than they are.
Perry: Oh, ooh! Live satellite feed. Let's pull up the school. I wanna see if the sheriffs are still sniffin' around for me.
Bree: What was that?
Perry: I didn't do it.
Chase: Guys, she just activated Mr. Davenport's defense program and fired a rocket at Mission Creek High.
Adam: Hey, what a coincidence. We go there. This is really bad. That rocket's gonna hit the school, and the place is packed. Tonight is the state championship.
Bree: Plus, Leo's there on a date with Janelle.
Adam: Oh, two disasters in one night. Poor Leo.
Perry: Okay, what's really goin' on here?
Bree: Principal Perry, we're not at an enemy base. We're actually in our lab, which is in the basement of our house.
Perry: Oh, you tricked me? I hate being tricked. Do you know how many magicians I've made disappear?
Eddy: Hey, what's the deal with señorita sausage paws?
Perry: What is that?
Eddy: I'm Eddie, your smart home security system.
Perry: I'm Terry Perry, their principal, moral compass, and 1984 log-splitting champion of alberta, Canada, men's division.
Eddy: I thought I recognized the beard.
Perry: It was a 'stache!
Bree: Principal Perry, focus, focus. There is a rocket headed toward our school, and we have to stop it.
Perry: No, not the school. All my wrestling equipment is in there.
Chase: Guys, we only have four minutes until this thing hits. Mr. Davenport redesigned everything about this lab. I can't figure out how to stop it.
Adam: This is the kind of crisis that calls for a chilled beverage. Oh, wait.
Bree What was that? What just happened?
Eddy: Your mission leader just put you on lockdown. Now no one can get in or out. Well, except me. Later, losers.
Bree: We've gotta call Leo and tell everyone to get out of there. There's no service! The lockdown must be blocking our cell phone signal.
Adam: Multi-million dollar makeover, and he couldn't install a land line? Genius, my butt.
Leo: Thanks for staying and giving me a second chance.
Janelle: Just waiting for my double vision to go away.
Leo: Look out! See? You're safe with me.
Leo: Are you okay?
Janelle: Do I look okay? Forget your stepdad's technology. It's you, you're bad luck.
Leo: I'm bad luck? You're the one who keeps getting hit in the Do you wanna go for a walk?
Janelle: I'm sorry, Leo. I don't think we should hang out anymore.
Leo: Well, that came outta nowhere.
Adam: Man, I'm gonna miss that school. Well, I should get to bed, it's a school night.
Donald: What's going on in there?
Bree: Finally! Mr. Davenport's here.
Adam: Wait! It could be a trap.
Chase: Hey, Mr. Davenport. Don't worry. Everything is fine.
Donald: Of course it is. That's why I got an alert on my phone that the lab is on lockdown! What's going on?
Chase: Well, remember your rocket program?
Bree: Perry may have accidentally Sent one to hit our high school.
Perry: Hi, don.
Donald: Nobody touch anything. I'm gonna try and hack my way into my own security program. It's not accepting my override command. Why did I have to design it so perfectly?
Bree: Wow, even in a crisis, that ego does not quit.
Donald: Adam, would you mind using your strength to destroy my brand-new lab doors?
Perry: Back up, jumbo. I got this.
Bree and Chase: - No! -
Adam: Yes! ‘Wow, she opened it. Maybe we should add her to the team.
Leo: Janelle, I am not bad luck.
Janelle: What's that fiery object hurtling towards us?
Leo: Shooting star. Quick, make a wish. Mine is that we live for two more minutes.
Donald: I should be able to shut down the rocket remotely from here. I just have to switch everything to the satellite feed.
Perry: Satellite feed.
Bree: You okay? You look weird der than normal.
Perry: Course, I'm okay. Mr. Whiskers. Come to mama.
Donald: Get her off me. Get her off me! How could you let her down here? She's shedding.
You are all grounded forever! Times three times pi. The rocket's too close to its target.
I can't stop it from here.
Bree: Chase, can't you slow it down with your molecular kinesis?
Chase: Not something that big traveling that fast.
Donald: It's only three minutes from its target. We have to evacuate that school. Adam, Bree, go! - Adam: Is too much to ask for a please? -
Bree: Come on.
Chase: You think they can do it?
Donald: They're our only hope.
Perry: Mr. whiskers, time for a rubby-rub-rub on your tummy-tum-tum. Mr. whiskers! Mr. whiskers!!
Janelle: It's getting closer. What do we do?
Leo: I don't think there's anything we can do. Except Hide behind this thing.
Bree: There's only 20 seconds before the rocket hits. There is no way we can get everyone out on time.
Adam: Don't worry. I have an idea.
Bree: Great, what are you gonna do, throw a car at it?
Adam: No, but that's way better than my idea. Let's do that.
Donald: Look, something's hurtling towards the rocket.
Perry: Huh. That looks like my new car. That is my new car!
Donald and Chase: - Yes! -
Adam: Whoa, it worked. Let's grab another car, just to make sure.
Bree: No. Come on, let's get out of here.
Leo: I think we're safe.
Janelle: We made it.
Leo: Janelle, look out!
Janelle: Leo, you just saved my life.
Leo: Well, it's I mean, ya know It's what I do.
Janelle: Thank you. I guess you're not bad luck. I'm so glad that was only pudding.
Leo: Oh, wow! Principal Perry was right. That kitty litter does clump.
Perry: So it's an actual mission this time?
Chase: No, we're going on a pancake run.
Chase: No, calm down. I'm kidding.
Adam: We're in dangerous enemy territory somewhere in a place called new labistan.
Perry: Hey, this looks just like the place we were at last time.
Bree: Really? Does this look the same?
Perry: Aaahhh! Hey, there's a mini fridge down here.
Adam: Oh, come on!