Spike's Got Talent/Transcript

This is a Transcript of Episode Spike's Got Talent, it's still under construction

Transcript

Chase: Did you guys see the yearbook? Everybody but me got a "Most likely to...". Even Leo!

Leo: What? Let me see that. (reads) "Most likely never to get a 'most likely'". I'm on the board!

Chase: Well, that proves it. I'm completely invisible at this school.

Adam: Chase, that's not true. If you were invisible, I couldn't do this. (punches Chase in the chest)

Chase: Ugh!

Bree: Chase, just because you weren't nominated doesn't mean you're invisible.

Chase: Oh, really? Yeah? What's this? "Chip Davenport". I'm a misnamed question mark!

Perry: Wussup, snot-buckets? Don't forget to sign up for the annual Mission Creek High talent show. Auditions are after school, and we'll be judged, by (points at herself) moi. Chances are that if I don't like you, you won't get through, and I don't like any of you, so good luck.

Owen: Talent shows are wrong! There are no winners or losers in creative expression.

Perry: Stick a paintbrush into it, Emo Sabe!

Owen: I refuse to stand by while that woman crushes the artistic souls of our student body. I'm gonna go sketch my feelings!

Bree: He is so tortured. Isn't it great?

Leo: This talent show is the perfect opportunity for me to build my fan base.

Chase: Leo, you don't have a fan base.

Leo: I know. That's why I have to build one. With magic!

Chase: Well, that is what it would take.

Leo: No. I got a magic kit and I've been practicing, specifically for the competition.

Chase: A magic kit? Isn't that kind of lame?

Leo: There is nothing lame about buying something off the Internet to make friends. (walks over to two girls) Hello, ladies. Would you like to see a card trick? (pulls out the card) Okay, this is your card. Hey, what's that in your hair? (pulls the card out of one of the girls' hair) Bam! See? Magic.

Chase: You know what my problem is? All of my talents are bionic, and I can't reveal them at school.

Leo: Aw. Bionic people problems.

Chase: Hey-- Give me those cards. Come on. Gimme. Watch this. (walks over to two girls) Hello, ladies. Pick a card, any card. Put it back in. (pulls out the cards) Is this your card? This one? This one? This one? This one?

(Leo pulls out a card)

Leo: Boom. Magic.

(Theme song.)

(Cut to the talent show. A kid is singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star with water in his mouth.)

Perry: Next! Don't you spit that out! You swallow that disgusting performance!

Leo: A-ha!

Perry: Ugh! Dooley. Next!

Leo: Come on. Give me a chance.

Perry: Ah, fine. Just get it over with.

Leo: Three solid steel rings, pass right through each other to become interlocked. Locked solid, right? (the rings disappear)

Perry: (laughs)

(applause)

Perry: Wow! That wasn't awful! All right, you're in.

Leo: For my next trick, I'll leave while I'm ahead.

(Chase comes on stage)

Perry: What's your talent? Other than having my middle school haircut.

Chase: I am the smartest man to ever live. Break out your online dictionaries, people. I can spell any word.

Perry: I got one for ya: "snoozefest". Ha ha ha!

(the audience boos)

Perry: Next!

Chase: No! No! I have another talent! I can do magic!

Leo: Oh, no, you can't.

(Chase activates his molecular kinesis ability)

Perry: Whoa-ho!

(audience cheers)

Perry: Whoa! (laughs) Ha ha ha ha! Yeah! Wow! That was amazing!

(the audience claps)

Perry: Dooley, you're out. Little Dutch boy, you're in.

Leo: Great job, Chase. Hey, maybe for your next trick, you can remove this knife from my back!

(at Davenport Industries)

Owen: